Happy Pride!

This year marks the my first year as an ace published author. I’ve a few thoughts on the matter and I’m excited to share them.

Let me start by saying, I’m ace.

And if you’re not sure what that means, it’s short for asexual. An asexual person doesn’t experience sexual attraction the same as people of other sexualities, if at all. For me, I don’t experience sexual attraction at all.

But you write romance.

I sure do. And I like to think I do a relatively decent job at it.

Before you get too far into reading this, understand this entry is more of a loose collection of my thoughts with no real point I want to drive home. Consider it a journal entry if you’d like.

In my experience, there’s a thin, but clear line between romantic attraction and sexual attraction. I experience the former, quite vividly. But never the latter. Ever.

Without delving into the particulars of my brand of asexual, yeah, spice in romance books can be nice. But really, for me, the heart of romance lies in the yearning, the connection, the journey of discovering who the love interest is, and in some cases, falling hard despite all intentions.

This is not me saying Ves is ace. She’s not. Not by any means. But her story does draw from my experience as an asexual—as I know, very well, what it’s like to desire true connection. What worked for my heart, and what didn’t. What I’ve learned through my experience is what I’ve put into play in Ves’ story.

But I’m getting side tracked—I’m not openly vocal about my sexuality. But I will state it when asked. Not because I’m ashamed, but because I’m often met with ridiculous questions about asexuality or scrutiny when it’s then revealed that yes, I do have a husband (a doting one at that) which gives us a very straight-passing appearance. And as a number of us know, having a straight-passing partner often carries erasure. Bisexuals also experience this. But assure you, I’m queer. My husband, who is also ace, is queer too.

June is the one time of year where I’m not met with as much scrutiny when I tell people I’m ace.

Seeing socials flood with rainbows is always amazing. I love it so much. In recent years, more ace colors have begun to fly and that fills my heart even more. This year, being on socials as an author and having author mutuals… I’ve been able to find other ace authors and that has moved me to tears. And I’m not surprised to find many I’ve stumbled across are also romance authors. Just as it had been validating to come across asexuality as a sexual identity, coming across other ace authors has been incredibly therapeutic and validating for me.

So here’s to my first Pride as an ace author. So far, it’s been one for the books. (Ah-ha, see what I did there?)

While The Fated Celestials Trilogy doesn’t feature an ace protagonist, The Darkness Reigns Trilogy will.

And it will absolutely still be romance.